Minnesota Renaissance Festival

Linda’s Take

Jason and I love going out to the Minnesota Renn Fest and the family likes going out there as well. We took the kids and a friend and his son there one weekend. We wanted to have the kids see a few shows that you can only see there. Anything with fire is always going to be a hit! We also watched a belly dancing show and the kids got to enjoy music and food that is different from your everyday life. Also our kids love to watch the joust: horses, armor, and sword fighting….what’s not to love about it!?!?

A few weeks later Jason and I went out there, just the two of us. I was so happy to wear my red leather(editor’s note: sexy!) that we bought there about 10 years ago. It’s a place were leather is encouraged, and I must admit I like to wear leather. Shopping in all the shops is always fun there, whether its spending money or just window shopping. I got some jewelry and some more leather, a leather pouch this time, not clothes, and Jason got some weapons! I must admit that he will look super sexy if he learns to use them right, guys who know how to use swords and axes are always hot! Oh, and I tried alligator for the first time! Pretty good too!

I always give this place 5 out of 5 pants off!!!!!

Jason’s Take

Renn Fest is awesome, though this is the first year we’ve gone three different time.

The first time, we brought the kids, because belly and fire dancers are an important part of growing up.

The other two times, we had Punk #1 watch Punks 2 & 3 so we could have some adult time.

Not like that, get your mind out of the gutter. Mostly.

The show are good. We caught a fire show, a belly dancing show, several juggling acts, and a few others. If there’s a show that can happen in a 1500s world, you can see it out there and have a good time doing so.

Most of the food is nothing spectacular. It’s a lot of easy-to-serve fried stuff. I love the chicken wild rice breadbowl soup, while Linda totally dug the frozen chocolate covered banana. Eating that while wearing red, low-cut leather is a sure way to get attention. The gyros and gator are good. The bloomin’ onion is not. The gelato is worth eating.

If you’re into kink, there are straps, collars, cuffs, and blindfolds galore. If you’re into steampunk or random anachronistic costumes, you’re set. If you like old-looking weapons or decorations, you can scratch that itch. If you dig watching women walk around in clothes they’d be too embarrassed to leave the house in any other time of the year, you’ll leave happy. There’s a lot of leather, lace, and silk at Renn Fest, both in the stores and on the visitors.

I give it 5 out of 5 pants off.

Total Score

Forever Yogurt

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Jason’s Take

A few nights ago, Linda had to work, and I had to come up with something to entertain the kids.

My solution: frozen yogurt from Forever Yogurt in the West End development. They’ve got 16 flavors of frozen yogurt, 50 different toppings to put on them to make the frozen yogurt as far from a healthy alternative to ice cream as possible, and they are immediately next to the most deserted part of the parking ramp complex over there.

They charge about 60 cents an ounce, so it stays affordable. It cost $23 to take three kids out, and they all love being able to get exactly what they want.

I strongly recommend limiting them to 3 or four toppings, or young brats will turn it into a horribly, sugary abomination that even they won’t eat.

Been there, done that.

I give it 4 out of 5 pants off.

Fred Astaire Dance Studio

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Jason’s Take

When we got married half a lifetime ago, we decided to take dancing lessons for the reception. And we rocked it.

A few months ago, Linda found a Groupon for the same studio (Fred Astaire in Eagan), so she signed us up, and we’ve been going every week since.

And we’re still rocking it.

Chad and Beth are our instructors and they are good at what they do. Once you get past the beginner stage, you’ll pick four dances to focus on. Their theory is that it’s as easy to learn 4 dances as it is to learn two, because so many of the steps are similar. We learning the Waltz, Rumba, Swing, and Tango. Just like Gomez and Morticia.

Some guys are going to read this and think they can’t take dance lessons because it’s too girly. All I can say to that is that dancing is foreplay. There ain’t nothing un-manly about foreplay.

And seriously, if you go there, tell them Jason and Linda sent you. You’ll get a discount and we’ll get a free lesson.

5 out of 5 pants off.

Linda’s Take

A few months back, Jason and I were looking to going out on dates to connect with each other. I looked on Groupon and found a beginner group dance class at Fred Astaire Dance Studio. I found some more information about the place and found out that this was where we took dance lessons at before we got married, now in a new location.

I kept this as a total surprise to Jason, not giving any hints as to what we were going to do. When we got there I saw the biggest smile on his face and he was super happy to do this with me again. I felt like I did something right and was also super happy.

After we did our Groupon special–an unlimited month’s worth of beginner group lessons for only $69.00–we decided that we should make this a hobby to get better at. So we signed up for a beginner package deal. Plus, if we had friends to join up for any classes we would get a free class and friends would get a discount on their package classes.

Ballroom dancing is something that you both have to work at, just like a relationship. You have to work together to sync up, and when you do, magic happens!

I have to admit that when we go out dancing at local places, I love being the girl that others girls look at while I’m dancing with Jason and they are thinking, “I wish my boyfriend would learn how to dance with me like that!” Actually Jason is the one who pointed that out to me, when we are dancing I’m totally focusing on him.

5 out of 5 pants off!!!

Total Score

Minnehaha Park

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Linda’s Take

We needed something to do for a Sunday afternoon, but money can be tight with a family of 5. Jason came up with the idea of going to Minnehaha Falls because our younger kids had never seen it.

Other than a bit of whining about how far we had to walk to the falls from my parking spot the kids. That the falls were really wonderful to watch and they were amazed at what they saw.

We all did a bit of hiking along the river and the kids were asking many questions, we even got a smile out of her teenage son. I think we hiked a total of 3 miles that day, and with all the beauty of the river, I don’t think I even heard one complaint.

My review is that if you want a great place to picnic, or enjoy a walk with the family, friends, or a special someone, this is the place to go. But parking can be a pain.

I give it 4 out of 5 pants off.

Jason’s Take

Lately, we’ve been trying to take the brats out to do something active on the weekends. A couple of weeks ago, we decided the thing to do was go hiking around Minnehaha Falls. You get to see the falls, then you have an option to hike 5-ish miles up one side of the river and down the other. The trails are pretty easy, and there are six (I think) bridges to give you a chance to turn back and walk up a different trail.

It’s nice, it’s close, and it makes me want to pose Linda in sexy outfits on some of the nice stone bridges, just to take photos I can’t post on Facebook.

It’s a good time and definitely worth doing. If you drive past the main parking lot and don’t mind a short walk, there’s a small parking lot that’s usually pretty empty by the lock and dam.

I give it 3 out of 5 pants off.

Total Rating

3.5 Pants Off

French Regional Park

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Linda’s Take

Needed the kiddos to get out of the house and get some exercise, not to mention Jason and I could use some more too. We ended up having an extra kid with us, so we wanted to go somewhere close.

We decided to head to Clifton E. French Regional Park, there is plenty of parking and a great playground for the kids.

We told the kids that we were gonna skip the playground and get some good hiking in. The trails are well maintained and it was nice to walk on the grass instead of something paved. Not as much to look at but plenty of shade on the trails to help cool you down.

After a 2.5 mile hike we surprised the kids by letting them splash around in the lake. The beach was nice and clean and the picnic area looks fun.

I laid out on the beach and got to sun bath, my first time wearing a bikini in public. I think I surprised myself doing that! The kids loved splashing in the water, it was very shallow and great for them to cool off. Plus there was ice cream that you could buy, always a plus.

My review is 5 out of 5 pants off for a great family place to go!

Jason’s Take

Keeping with the idea of making the brats leave the house on the weekends, we went out French Regional Park last weekend. There are 10-ish miles of trails, plus a small, shallow swimming beach, and boat rentals. Linda and I have rented a kayak in the past, but we didn’t do that this time.

We hiked a couple of miles, then headed to the beach. The end of the swimming are is only chest high on the girls, so it was nice to sit down and read a book while they pretended to swim. Linda took the opportunity to get some sun. The trails are mostly undeveloped, but have solar-powered streetlights in places, so late hiking is also a possibility.

I give it 3 pants off.

Total Rating

4 Pants Off

The CSI Experience – Mall of America

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Linda’s Take

So this time I thought that we would try something that was only going to be around for a short time and noticed at MOA they had a CSI hands-on experience going on.

So Jason and I tried it.

I thought the price was ok for doing some science crime stuff, we went in and the tutorial at the beginning said to note everything from the crime seen down, so we both took a lot of notes. Then you go to process the evidence, you don’t process anything. Basically you read through everything and choose the best answer. Anyone with common sense can get the right answers.

In all it was fun, but I feel that the whole thing is geared around someone for the ages of 10 to 15. I wouldn’t spend the money to do it again, however if my 14 year old would like to go, I would bring him.

I give it a 3 out of 5 pants off.

Jason’s Take

Linda’s too generous. It doesn’t require common sense to get the right answers. If you can read the plaques on the wall in the “lab”, you can get it right.

I was hopeful. It was such a fun concept, but it was geared to 8 year olds who want to pretend they are in Mommy’s favorite show, not adults. There’s no puzzle to solve. One of the “labs” involved pushing eight different buttons until you found the one that didn’t turn on a white light. Ooh, orange! I win!

Sad, but I’d take our kids to it and they’d have fun.

2 pants off

Total Rating

2.5 Pants Off

Big Thrill Factory

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Linda’s Take

So I had a date night with my hubby and I was looking for something for to do that could make us feel young and fun that we hadn’t done together, yet. I was doing some research on the internet of things to do with your kids to not have them bored out of there minds and came across the Big Thrill Factory at 17585 Minnesota 7, Minnetonka, MN 55345, (952) 698-7700.

Each night they have a special deal going on and the thing that looked the best for our date night was laser tag. I kept it a total surprise from him and later when we got there I found out that his work was planning to do the same thing at their next function. How awesome,! Now he could try it with me first!

Prices are reasonable and other than the fact that we were adults and there were a bunch of preteens running around having fun, we had a great time. Mini golf was fun and the course was interesting
but simple for all ages.The laser tag was fun and the staff tries to even out the teams and keep things fair for all. There are 2 levels and plenty of places to be sneaky.

Linda’s Rating: 3 out of 5 pants off

Jason’s Take

All I knew was that date night was going to be a surprise. I wasn’t too worried, because I knew that she had invited a couple of friends, so it wasn’t going to be anything shocking. No swing clubs or skydiving.

The place is mostly geared to kids. They have a small-ish arcade, a 10-lane bowling alley, mini-golf, some jungle-gym thing that would hurt my knees, and a giant trampoline. They also have a zombie puzzle that give you an hour to solve the puzzle or die. I’m assuming it’s a metaphorical death, but if not, that’s motivation. Next to that is the rope course, bumper cars, and the highlight of our evening, laser tag.

We played a couple of rounds of tag. You get a funky light-up vest with a gun attached. One team goes in first, followed by the other team in about a minute. You get points for shooting your opponents, shooting accurately, and shooting these little targets up on the wall.

If you’re going for date night, I strongly recommend going late. Unfortunately, they are only open until 11. If you go early, you stand a good chance of playing laser tag with a bunch of 10 year old s***s who will follow you around constantly shooting you, so the second your vest reactivates, you’re dead. If they aren’t there, the game is a blast.

They also serve beer.

Jason’s Rating: 3 out of 5 pants off

Total Rating: 3 out of 5 pants off

Yoga With Cher

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Linda’s Take

Jason had a new idea to have us try a yoga class. I thought this was kinda odd coming from my man. But even know I was shocked at his suggestion, I told him that I know of someone who teaches yoga classes and I would contact her to get more information.

Turns out she is someone who graduated from my school, same class year. And her daughter and our youngest girl were in the same class last school year.

So she offers a beginner yoga class on Sundays starting at 12:30pm for only $12.00 dollars, and also she offers a kids yoga class starting at noon for only $8.00 dollars per child.

I thought wow, something new for the whole family to try. However our teenage son didn’t want to go. No matter how much we tried, yoga isn’t as cool as computer games. She teaches her classes at The Iron Gym in St Louis Park. They have pretty much a full working gym, but none of the high power technology machines. However it’s quiet and that makes it perfect for yoga, because as I found out it’s about a lot of breathing.

I never thought that holding positions and stretches while breathing would make you so sweaty. It’s a workout!

I think we are going to go again, also our girls liked it as well and want to come again too. And we found out that our neighbor would like to check it out!

This is an idea for the whole family to do.
I give it 4 out of 5 pants off!

Jason’s Take

I recently read The First 20 Hours. It’s a book about learning the basics of any skill in…wait for it…20 hours. One of the skills the author documented was yoga. Before reading the book, I’d never given yoga any thought. I’d always mentally dropped into the “chick stuff” category and forgotten about it.

I read the book, and decided to give yoga a shot. I mentioned it to Linda and she said she had a friend who taught. A dozen Facebook messages later, we were signed up and ready to go.

The class is at a gym in a warehouse space on the border of St. Louis Park and Hopkins. It was hot yoga that day, but only because it was almost 100 degrees outside and we were in a warehouse space.

We brought the girls for the kids yoga class immediately before the adult class. They liked in, but our youngest thought it was too hot and the wait for the adult class was too long. I told her to bring a book next time.

Thing I didn’t realize about yoga: It’s a workout. I always pictured it as the thing soccer mommies did instead of something. I was wrong. It’s a solid workout that includes strength and flexibility training. Who doesn’t want to be more flexible? Sex swings are always more fun with high-end acrobatics, right?

Totally worth doing. I give it 4 out of 5 pants off.

Total Score

4 out of 5 Pants Off

Mainstreet Bar & Grill

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Linda’s Take

Mainstreet Bar & Grill

So my best friend’s husband was going to celebrate his birthday at Mainstreet’s. I had been to Mainstreet’s many times before but this time, since both Jason and I were going to go, why not write a review!

I like this bar, it is one of the few bars that is great at keeping your drink glass full and just looks like a regular bar, plus they have live music every weekend.

There are some drawbacks to the place.

The food is okay; it’s your typical bar food and nothing I would brag about.
There is a dance floor, however it is on the smaller size so it can fill up quickly. Most of the time the bands are good, they do have some popular regular bands, however the night we both went there the guy sucked!
I guess the biggest drawback is when the band plays you can’t hear anyone that is trying to talk to you. So to wrap it up, great place to go and drink and have fun! Not so good if you want to catch up and talk with friends.

I give it 3 out of 5 pants off.

Jason’s Take

We went to Mainstreet’s Bar in downtown Hopkins for a friend’s birthday party.

We’ve been there before, but have never taken the time to review it.

The place is a dive bar, pure and simple. The food is totally on par with what you’d expect from a dive bar. It’s greasy and really only good when you’ve been drinking. The drinks are cheap and the staff is friendly.

They’ve got live music nearly every night and a decent-but-not-large dance floor.

It doesn’t feel like a meat market, but judging by the number of people I know who’ve gotten lucky by going to Mainstreet’s, it’s not a bad place to go if you’re feeling lonely.

I give it 3 out of 5 pants off.

Total Score:

3 Out of 5 Pants Off

Uptown Theater – Rocky Horror Picture Show

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Linda’s Take

What is Halloween weekend with out seeing Rocky Horror Picture Show?

In the Twin Cities it plays at the Uptown Theater on Halloween weekend and on the last Saturday of each month.

Jason and I used to go see Rocky all of the time before we got married and it was awesome to go see it again with him. The coolest thing was hearing all of the awesome commentary that gets shouted out while watching the movie and Jason seemed to not forget a thing.

The Uptown Theater is nice and had really comfortable seats. I don’t think there was a bad seat in the house. The website stated there is a full bar, but I didn’t try it. And, of course, they have the traditional movie popcorn and candy.

The group of people that acted out the movie were a lot of fun. They want the audience to participate in everything from throwing rice, toilet paper, and dressing up like the movie.

I wore a corset and tight black pants that night, but Jason said I was overdressed and so the next time I go he suggested bra and panties.

There is no parking around the theater, the closest place for parking is the Calhoun Square ramp, but it’s only 3 blocks away. Otherwise there is always the city bus system.

Note: If you don’t like fun, vulgar sexual remarks and/or movements don’t go. If you do, come to see Rocky on the last Saturday of each month!

3 out of 5 pants off

Jason’s Take

Rocky Horror Picture Show. That used to be my go-to activity for a Saturday night. Round up some Rocky Virgins and head to the theater at midnight. What a blast. Then we had kids and stopped going.

This year for Halloween, we decided to skip our traditional Halloween party and revisit our past.

Uptown Theater is a block north of Lake and Hennepin, on Hennepin. The Calhoun Square ramp is a block east and a block south of the theater, so it’s crazy-easy to get to. It’s right next door to Chino Latino, so it’s easy to pre-game at the bar there.

If you’re not familiar with Rocky, it’s a cult film from the 70s starring Tim Curry in drag and Susan Sarandon in lingerie. It’s sex jokes from beginning to end. When it’s played in the theater, there is a cast acting out the movie in front of the screen. They are all wearing costumes. A huge chunk of the audience also wears costumes, but that sometimes just means showing up in their underwear or opening their shirts to the waist to display their bras. Which is fun, too.

Audience participation is a must. There are people shouting out bits in relation to the movie during the entire movie. If you want to catch the plot, it would be better to see it on DVD. If you want to have fun, go to the theater.

I love Rocky and plan to go back at the end of the month.

5 out of 5 stars.

Linda’s Take

Jason’s Take

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Total Score: 4 out of 5 stars